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I Can Do It

27.02.2018

How many times do we wonder which personal strengths are helping us achieve what we want? How many times have we thought that it would be easier for us to fulfill our wishes if we could listen to other people talk about their paths, share our own and if we would get to know each other and connect more? What is our understanding of success and what leads us to it? How does the path to success look like and how should we overcome the obstacles on that path? The answers to those questions lie within ourselves, but the road that leads to them is often tiring and stressful and we give up easily. That is why on February 24, at the first workshop of the project “Share Your Knowledge“, psychodrama therapists Karolina Voros and Jelena Milic Jerkovic guided the participants of the project through the path of finding answers to these questions within themselves. 


The assistance of Milana Milosevic, a software engineer and PhD student at the Faculty of Electrical Engineering, was just as important. She gave some instructions and tricks on time management and on how to succeed in achieving perhaps the most important goal of all and that is spending our time and energy on all the things we want to have in our life. 

Whenever we ask ourselves which inner strengths help us achieve what we want, the first step is to turn around and look back at what we have done up until now and how we have done it. Each one of us has started somewhere and has been through numerous changes in order to become what she is today. Each change brought us a new strength, made our will stronger and pointed out that we are getting better each day, even thought we don't think about that every single day and that isn't visible on a daily basis. A great inspiration was derived from the exercise of taking a position in space in relation to the place we came from and changing position in relation to the place we are living now – leaving our hometown isn't easy but it can bring us a new strength and show how ready we are to move forward on our road to achieving our goals. The profession that we chose to practise is the area of life where we will get the recognition we deserve. The job, which we chose to devote most of our everyday life to, gives us opportunity to enjoy good things, but it also enables us to fight against the bad things. Public sector jobs are static and don't provide much space for creativity, but they bring financial stability and greater job security. Private sector jobs are dinamic and they provide big opportunities for independent acquisition of knowledge and experience, but they are quite uncertain and stressful by their very nature. Jobs within the civil society sector provide freedom, variety and innovation, while, on the other hand, there is a lack of financial stability. In the end, each of us has to be ready to accept that because, in life, everything is a symbiosis of the good and bad. It is interesting how our jobs define us, but it's even more interesting when we realize that our differences can bring us together, make us see that the basic stuff are always shared, and those are the most common concerns and dillemas.


A special type of inspiration and encouragement for each of us came from an exercise of stepping forward. While standing in a circle, each of us took a step forward and revealed something about herself (e.g. a characteristic, habit, life event, fear or hope) in order to turn around and see how many people related to that. The feeling of sharing our strengths and weaknesses, concerns and hopes, strengthens each of us, helps us realize that we are not alone and it encourages us to connect with people even more by being open and sincere. Connecting with people is valuable in itself because it makes us brave enough to say that we don’t know something, it makes us capable of being satisfied for being good at something and calm when we are not good at some things. The sense of belonging that connecting with people brings is actually the sense of tranquility and love for everything that each of us is. We feel particularly strong when we realize that we are different enough to be able to learn from one another, to complement each other and when we help someone grow – we ourselves grow as well.


It is also important to know that it is fine that we sometimes feel lost because that is already a step we make toward finding ourselves again. Business continuum, as an exercise, helped inexperienced, experienced and the most experienced women to examine themselves on their career and life path. When you, as a beginner, imagine yourself as a skilled expert, ask yourselves what would you tell yourself and you will definitely find peace and encouragement. Looking back at yourself from the future in that way brings very useful tips such as “don’t worry as much and think less”, “don’t give up and believe in yourself”, “believe in your own strengths” and “recognize your own worth”. The conclusion is that we always need affirmation from more experienced, wiser and often older people than us, people who are ready to share their knowledge with us. So, it could be heard that it is important that we do in life what we want from the bottom of our heart and not what we think we should do. It is important that we are true to ourselves and accept our own answers to questions about what we really want and why we do what we do. If those answers don’t go well with one another, it could happen that we go far away from ourselves and spend time on something that brings us money, but not satisfaction. Only then, we are at the beginning again, but this time with one failure. That is why listening to yourself and finding real motives is the most important lesson for reaching satisfaction and becoming successful.


During self-reflexion, it is important for us to know what we can rely on. The most common responses are: family and partners, creativity, persistence, wisdom to accept reality, positivity, emotions and intuition, honest relationships, strength and courage, as well as knowing that it is okay to fail as a first step to moving forward even faster in life. We learned that we have a lot of things to rely on both within ourselves and within others.


In the end, success takes time, more specifically, accurate perception of time. We make the most mistakes when we perceive time through its quantity (e.g. ten years of studying or fifteen years of service) because it is not important how much time has passed but how we used that time. We should perceive time through its quality, that is, working time, time spent on ourselves, our hobbies, partying and close people. Time management as a skill contributes to the quality of life and allows us not to look at success as the final destination which requires that you constantly give up on things, but as a way station for us to visit in order to get an emergency dose of happiness and self-verification. When we are able to identify and eliminate time thieves, prioritize activities and listen to the inner desires and needs, we won’t have to give up on anything and still be able to enjoy each success! 


The first workshop on the project “Share Your Knowledge” is tremendously useful, because it has instructed us in reminding ourselves who we are, what we want, what we do and why we do it, as well as how we are not alone and how encouraging connecting with people is, because, in the end, we all share, if not identical then at least similar dilemmas, fears, hopes, wishes and needs.


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